Yes, you can. And right now if you are thinking about something where you would like to change your mind, but believe that I am wrong and that you can’t, I want you to know you can, it might be the hardest things you ever do, but you can and it will be worth it.
Tonight talking to my daughters about a decision they had made, talking through the reasons that had led them to that decision, one of the things holding them to their decision is that they had already told everyone. I told them, you can change your mind. After telling them that, I got thinking about all of the things that I had thought were permanent, stuck, the ultimate way of being, and immovable. That I would not be who I am, where I am, doing what I am, had I not put in the effort, and work to change my mind thereby changing the trajectory of my life.
Changing my mind wasn’t always easy, wasn’t always met with high fives and cheers from those around me, and sometimes left me feeling that life was impossible if that was the only solution. Left me questioning how changing my mind to honor what I felt in my heart, but could possible burn down everything around me, could be in my best interest. I didn’t get out unscathed as I made these decisions. I have the scars, I still feel pangs in my heart, but also feel my ability to love, honor, respect, and empathize with others is greater because I learned that I could change my mind and I want you to know that you can to.
Small things, I changed my mind about what I wanted to be when I grew up, about 5 times. When I was little it was normal, when I got into college it got more expense (I had 30 credits more than I needed for my associates degree). I started out majoring in elementary education, and received my associates in business. Headed into marketing for a few classes, then took a 13 year break. I spent year 10-13 of that break trying to figure every which way I could get a degree, without going back to school, because in my mind going back to school with 6 kids between the ages of 2-10 was impossible. I changed my mind and got my bachelors in psychology in 2015.
When my kids start to panic because they don’t know what they want to go into for college (apparently lots of pressure in grades 8-11 to KNOW what you want to do for the next 70 years of your life!) I let them know how many times I changed my mind, and that I want them to not know, and experience life and change their mind until it feels right, AND if after 10 years they change their mind again, that’s okay.
I changed my mind about the style in which I parent my children.
I changed my mind about religion.
I changed my mind about being a doormat in my relationships with others.
I changed my mind about health and the responsibility I have towards it.
I changed my mind about running.
I changed my mind about drinking Diet Coke, and coffee.
I changed my mind about what I was capable of doing.
I changed my mind that this year that I like American Idol more than The Voice (sorry Adam, but Katey Perry is really great this year!)
I often tell clients that many times the answer is in the never. Meaning when you are trying to work something out, solve something, moving forward or towards something, the solution may be the very thing you said “I would never…” The reason that may seem like the impossible solution is because it will involve changing your mind. In order for your life to be different you have to start interacting with it differently and that starts with changing your mind.